When you look at a break up you see the person who was dumped and the person who dumped. Why did God choose me to be the person who was dumped? If I dumped my ex, my life would be totally different right now as would his. I believe that because I was dumped I took it harder than he did. I think we both were falling away from each other though. I still am angry that I had to be the one who was dumped. I know God has a reason, but sometimes I just want to know what it would be like if I was the one who did the dumping. I want my ex to feel how much it hurts to be dumped. I felt rejected and worthless. I would go through our relationship in my head and try to find reasons why this happened. I would try to find ways to get him back into my life. I was willing to do anything. I felt lost cause as hard as I tried...I couldn't get him back.
It has been almost three months. It doesn't seem like it though. I still am hurting. I have a long ways to go before I finally do have peace. My heart is still on the road to recovery. It's a slow walk. I will trust that God does have a reason for all of this. He will get me through this.
Waiting for the day,
Emily
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